Strangely Dim

There is an old chorus that God has repeatedly used to shape my heart over the last few years...

“Turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full in His wonderful face. And the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace.”

I have spent a lot of time meditating on that phrase “strangely dim” and have seen how it fleshes itself out around the world. If we are turning our eyes to Christ, our material possessions, worldly experiences, selfish ambitions pale in comparison to Him. And the suffering, trials, and temptations we go through are still horrible, but not quite as bad in light of knowing Christ and focusing on Him.
I came across these two quotes along the same line of thinking as well, encouraging us to keep our eyes focused on Christ, no matter what our circumstances are.

“The highest of missionary motive is neither obedience to the Great Commission (important as that is), nor love for sinners who are alienated and perishing (strong as that incentive is, especially when we contemplate the wrath of God), but rather zeal — burning and passionate zeal — for the glory of Jesus Christ. . . . Only one imperialism is Christian . . . and that is concern for His Imperial Majesty Jesus Christ, and for the glory of his empire.”
~John Stott

“Let us live in the constant contemplation of the glory of Christ, and virtue will proceed from him to repair all our decays, to renew a right spirit within us, and to cause us to abound in all duties of obedience. . .
It will fix the soul unto that object which is suited to give it delight, complacency, and satisfaction. . . when the mind is filled with thoughts of Christ and his glory, when the soul thereon cleaves unto him with intense affections, they will cast out, or not give admittance unto, those causes of spiritual weakness and indisposition. . .
And nothing will so much excite and encourage our souls hereunto as a constant view of Christ and his glory.”
~John Owen

Here For You

As I have talked to various people about this trip, I have heard comments about how great it is what I am doing for myself by going on this adventure, how great it is that I am going to serve the Swazi people, and I was saddened by these well-meaning Christians who have lost the focus on why we do what we do. This song has been my prayer for this trip and is a great reminder that whether we are serving our loved ones at home, in ministry in the US, or overseas somewhere, the ultimate reality for every Christian is that we are here (wherever that may be) for Him alone...all else (that others & we ourselves are blessed through serving) is icing on the cake!

Let our praise be Your welcome, let our songs be a sign
We are here for You, we are here for You
Let Your breath come from heaven, fill our hearts with Your life
We are here for You, we are here for You
To You our hearts are open, nothing here is hidden, You are our one desire
You alone are holy, only You are worthy, God let Your fire fall down

Let our shout be Your anthem, Your renown fill the skies
We are here for You, we are here for You
Let Your word move in power, let what’s dead come to life
We are here for You, we are here for You
To You our hearts are open, nothing here is hidden, You are our one desire
You alone are holy, only You are worthy, God let Your fire fall down
To You our hearts are open, nothing here is hidden, You are our one desire
You alone are holy, only You are worthy, God let Your fire fall down
We are here for You, Jesus,

We welcome You with praise, we welcome You with praise, almighty God of love, be welcome in this place
We welcome You with praise, we welcome You with praise, almighty God of love, be welcome in this place
Let every heart adore, let every soul awake, Almighty God of love, be welcome in this place
We welcome You with praise, we welcome You with praise, almighty God of love, be welcome in this place

Be welcome...be welcome...come and take Your rightful place.

My Prayer For You As I Go...

The view from the plane as we come over the African Coast at Namibia.

"What I finally came to as I walked and prayed for you is the old, old story of getting the gospel clear in your own hearts and minds, making it clear to others, and doing it with only one motive — the glory of Christ. Getting the glory of Christ before your eyes and keeping it there is the greatest work of the Spirit that I can imagine. And there is no greater peace, especially in the times of treadmill-like activity, than doing it all for the glory of the Lord Jesus."
~Heart of a Servant Leader: Letters from Jack Miller

Profile of the Lukewarm

As I was sipping my lukewarm coffee this morning, I was reminded of Revelation 3:16, where God describes the stagnant faith of one of the seven churches. Francis Chan lists out the characteristics of a Lukewarm Christian in his book "Crazy Love" and they are good to reflect on as we can so easily slip into comfortable Christianity.

Lukewarm people:
1. attend church fairly regularly
2. give their money to charity and to the church...as long as it doesn’t impinge on their standard of living.
3. tend to choose what is popular over what is right when they are in conflict.
4. don’t really want to be saved from their sin; they want only to be saved from the penalty of their sin.
5. are moved by stories of people who do radical things for Christ, yet they do not act
6. rarely share their faith with their neighbors, coworkers, or friends.
7. gauge their morality or “goodness” by comparing themselves to the secular world.
8. say they love Jesus, and that He is a part of their lives...but only a part
9. love God but they do not love Him with all of their heart, soul, and strength
10. love others but do not seek to love others as much as they love themselves.
11. will serve God and others, but there are limits to how far they will go or how much time, money, and energy they are willing to give.
12. think about life on earth much more often than eternity in heaven.
13. are thankful for their luxuries and comforts, and rarely consider trying to give as much as possible to the poor.
14. do what is necessary to keep themselves from feeling too guilty.
15. are continually concerned with playing it safe; they are slaves to the god of control.
16. feel secure because they attend church, made a profession of faith, were baptized, come from a Christian family, vote Republican, or live in America.
17. do not live by faith; their lives are structured so they never have to.
18. probably drink and swear less than average, but besides that, they really aren’t very different from your typical unbeliever.

Recognizing My Idols

Money, image, a missionary lifestyle, children, success, marriage, ministry, status, health, education, comfort... I have been convicted lately about how easily I am recognizing the idols in the lives around me while growing numb to the idols in my own heart. As I have been reading in Isaiah lately, I realize I am not alone in growing numb to idols. The Israelites return to their idols over and over even though God warns them over and over through various tests & prophets. God reminds them (and us) through Isaiah that the man-made things we turn into idols are useless.

"All who make idols are nothing, and the things they delight in do not profit...Who fashions a god or casts an idol that is profitable for nothing?" (Isaiah 44:9-10)

Even good things (like family, friends, health) can become idols when they become ultimate things in our lives. We don't wake up in the mornings intent on making idols, but rather take a step down that slippery slope every time we allow anything else besides the Lord of the universe to be THE ultimate thing in our lives. So how do we prevent this?
Here are 13 great questions from an old Puritan sermon that help us to recognize our idols, that we may turn from worshiping created things back to worshiping the only ONE who deserves all of our worship.

1. What do I most highly value?
2. What do I think about by default?
3. What is my highest goal?
4. To what or whom am I most committed?
5. Who or what do I love the most?
6. Who or what do I or depend upon the most?
7. Who or what do I fear the most?
8. Who or what do I hope in and hope for most?
9. Who or what do I desire the most? Or, what desire makes me most angry or makes me despair when it is not satisfied?
10. Who or what do I most delight in or hold as my greatest joy and treasure?
11. Who or what captures my greatest zeal?
12. To whom or for what am I most thankful?
13. For whom or what great purpose do I work?

Caught In The Middle Of A Morreshet

Middles can be good or bad - people don't like the middle seat on the airplane, but they love the middle of an oreo. We have stereotypes for the middle child, and many times the middle is overlooked. But in most cases, the middle of something is the key link and without it, the whole of that thing would be compromised! Middles are necessary and blessings in disguise. At times there is more pressure on the middle than on the ends, because it often holds things up or holds them together. And as I have been reflecting lately on the role God has called me to be in the middle of a morreshet, I realize how key this middle role is here as well!
Morreshet is the Hebrew word for spiritual legacy, totally separate from their word for a physical/material inheritance. You can imagine how frequently this term was used as the Jews passed down their spiritual legacy from generation to generation. Unfortunately, we have become numb to the responsibility of passing down the spiritual legacy from one generation to another. We underestimate the importance of shaping future generations spiritually, and we will be held accountable for that one day. Yet passing on a spiritual legacy is hardwired into who we are as people and families, and has been since the beginning of creation.

"Hear O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down and when you rise." (Deuteronomy 6:4-9)

My life this month has been a realistic picture of what it means to be the middle generation of passing on a spiritual legacy. I spent a few hours a couple of weeks ago going through some old pictures and mementos of my grandparents. Included in these things were confirmation pictures, prayers, and Bibles. I am blessed to have both of my grandmothers' Bibles, but was captivated by some of the older Bibles I still have. A couple of these Bibles are written in German, and I imagine they accompanied my great-grandparents on their cross-country journey to settle in Colorado. As I look at the tattered pages and faded birth, baptism, marriage, & death records, I am reminded of what Charles Spurgeon said "The Bible that is falling apart usually belongs to the person whose life is not." I can imagine the many nights of hardship during the depression, during the unknowns of traveling across the country by wagon, during the early days of settling on the farm and raising a family...that these Bibles and the God revealed in and through them were the things that sustained my ancestors! I am reminded of their deep faith that called them to help start & build a church here in Loveland that is still standing today. And I am thankful for their faithfulness throughout the years - who knows how much of my life today is a fruit of the prayers they prayed for the future generations of their family.
Yet, I am caught in the middle because there is already another generation of our family, hungry to know the God who created them. I am thankful to live so close to my nieces and nephews, to be able to pray with them and talk with them about God. I love their brutal honesty, and curiosity about God, and their simple faith. And I may never see the fruit of the prayers I pray for them, but I know those prayers don't fall on deaf ears, because God hears each and every one of them, and is faithful to complete the work He has begun in each of them. And as we await the newest baby in our family, I pray that we, as a family, would take seriously and be faithful to the role that God has called us to - to raise this baby to know who God is, what He is like, and that salvation can be found in Him alone. More than learning how to read & write, more than learning how to talk & ride a bicycle, this child needs to learn about the God who created it and who has every day of its life planned out, even though it isn't born yet! May God give us the grace, strength, courage, and wisdom to be faithful to the role He has called us to.

"O God, from my youth you have taught me, and still I proclaim your wondrous deeds. So even to old age and gray hairs, O God, do not forsake me, until I proclaim your might to another generation, your power to all those to come." (Psalm 71:17-18)

Every time it snows...

While Denver has continued to stay warm into November, I have been blessed to be up enjoying a few days of winter this week! And I'm constantly amazed (and giddy) as it snows, as it is a tangible reminder that even though we muck up the world and make it dirty & ugly, God can turn it into a wonderland of clean, pure, refreshing whiteness in a matter of minutes. Over the past couple of weeks, in a couple of conversations, I was reminded of the ways that God speaks through His word about how we can compare the purity & completeness of our forgiveness to the whiteness of snow. And as I have been soaking in it (well, actually sitting warmly inside while watching it snow out the window) over the past couple of days, I have been reminded of the complete and permanent forgiveness we have been offered through Christ again.

"Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool." (Isaiah 1:18) "Cleanse me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow." (Psalm 51:7)

I Thirst To Be Made More Thirsty Still

“O God, I have tasted thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. I am painfully conscious of my need of further grace. I am ashamed of my lack of desire. O God, the Triune God, I want to want thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still. Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, that so I may know Thee indeed. Begin in mercy a new work of love within me. Say to my soul, “rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away.” then give me grace to rise up and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long. In Jesus’ name, amen.” (A. W. Tozer, The Pursuit Of God)

How Do I Think??

If someone tells me to think about something, what do I do? How long can I realistically think about it before my mind wanders down some random rabbit trail? My ADD mind often has trouble focusing on one thing for a long time, unless I am in a blank room with no sounds. So, as you can imagine, it makes it hard for me to follow all of the exhortations in Scripture to "meditate" on God's word, character, law, etc.
One of the Biblical words used for meditating on Scripture actually has ties to how a cow digests its food. With multiple stomachs, a cow eats something, digests it partially, regurgitates it to a different stomach, digests it more, passes it to a different stomach, and so on...until the end product comes out. So by the time it has thoroughly processed it, it's absorbed as many nutrients as it can and broken it down as much as possible. And that is how we are supposed to read/meditate on Scripture?!
It seems to make sense, but I still have had a hard time putting practical legs to this until I heard how Martin Luther taught his barber to pray as he meditates on Scripture (I actually heard it on a podcast, and pulled over on the side of Berthoud Pass to take notes because it was so impactful!) To say this has revolutionized how I read & pray Scripture is an understatement, so here is what Luther wrote in that letter to his barber, encouraging him to ask these questions as he is reading the Bible.
1. How can this passage/concept/word lead me to adore God?
2. How can this passage/concept/word lead me to confess sin?
3. How can this passage/concept/word lead me to petition [ask] for grace?
4. How is Jesus the ultimate revelation of this attribute; solution to sin; source of grace?

May this teaching bear fruit in your heart and your life as you feast on God's word!

"Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers."
(Psalm 1:1-3)

Asking Expectantly

What have you been praying for lately? In your prayer life, do you pray hesitantly or expectantly? I confess that often I pray timidly, not totally praying in faith for God to answer my prayers and meet my needs. You would think that after all of the examples of His faithfulness in my life, I would pray expectantly, knowing that He would sovereignly answer the prayers of my heart. Yet He used a 3 year old girl to remind me that too often I pray hesitantly and not expectantly.
While in Juarez, I bonded with a tiny 3 year old girl, who fell asleep in my arms within hours of me meeting her. Over then next 48 hours, we shared many songs, car rides, naps, and smiles...even though I could only speak a little of her language, and she could speak none of mine. She captured my heart as she sang, danced, and wouldn't let me put her down before we left. While her face will remain in my mind, the way God used her to teach me about prayer will remain in my heart!
A little while before we left, I was talking with some of the older girls, and this little 3 year old walked up to me, tapped my leg, handed me her two ponytail rubberbands, and turned around. Without a word of communication, or even really thinking, I squatted down to put her pigtails back in her hair. I didn't ask her what happened or wait for her to tell me what she needed, I just acted out of seeing her need, and her boldness of knowing she could ask me to do this for her and I would respond.
And I realized that just as she approached me, knowing I would help her, that is how I am to approach God with my needs and requests in prayer. Jesus taught us that through Him, we can bring all of our requests, prayers & needs to God...knowing that it is natural for Him to answer them because of who He is (Matthew 7:7-11).
So as we go through our day, let us come humbly,continually, and expectantly before the sovereign God of the universe with our needs.

"Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need." (Hebrews 4:16)

"...do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." (Philippians 4:6)

Radical Or Obedient?

I confess that for a time I used to think that missionaries and people in full time ministry were super-spiritual. I thought that they had something that I didn’t or that somehow God liked them better. I know it’s stupid, but I honestly thought that the more you served God, and the harder your circumstances were, the better off you were with God. As if our good works or radical living could somehow improve our status with God. I’m not the only one who thinks this though. And it’s nothing new - people have been trying to push this line for a long time, thinking that God will like them more if they live off of less or in harder circumstances - people making their own clothes, eating only organic, not using electricity. It doesn’t just go back to the 1990’s or the 1970’s, but it goes even further back to the desert fathers - the monks who thought they could increase their holiness by depriving themselves of more and more things.
But, that’s not the Gospel - that’s a works based system of salvation, where I am in control and it is all up to me. The truth is that

“We are accepted before God based on how righteous Jesus is, not how radical we are. Radical living flows from righteous standing”(David Platt).

And that truth should impact how we live - for some of us, it should free us to realize that we don’t have to put on the “radical” show - that our status before God doesn’t depend on what we do.
And for others of us - it should cause us to get up and live differently - that the fact that we have righteous standing before God will cause us to reevaluate how we spend our money, how we serve God, how we live our daily lives. And if our lives aren’t any different than the world we live in, we need to spend time reflecting on the righteous standing we have been given - and the cost it came by!
So the question I am asking myself this morning is “Am I trying to live more radically to make God like me better or am I striving to live more obediently as I continue to surrender to the promptings of the Holy Spirit?” Since I have been bought at a price and am not my own, I can’t put limits on how God calls me to serve Him. So, while it may seem more radical to go to another country to live and serve God, I am called to live obediently, right now meaning I must stay where I am and serve Him in the circumstances I am in. Radical & obedient living may mean to downsize in order to give more away; it may mean to quit your job here in the US to move overseas to do the same thing in a place where it is more needed; but it may also mean staying faithful & married in a hard marriage; reaching out to your family who doesn’t know Christ; or something else here where we find ourselves today.
As you & I reflect again on our righteous standing before God today, may it lead to radical living for His glory, His fame, and the furthering of His kingdom!

Now & Later - more than just a chewy candy!

What do you think about? Do you spend much time thinking about the future?
My sister is 8 months pregnant, and it is causing our whole family to think a little more about the future - wanting to meet this new little boy or girl, wondering how its 2 older siblings will respond to it, dreaming about the baby's personality, passions, gifts, looks, and future.
Yet what if I told you that my sister and her husband haven't changed their lifestyle at all since finding out they are pregnant with their third child. What if they didn't consider their insurance plan, their birth plan, prepare their other two children for it, buy maternity clothes, buy prenatal vitamins, go to the midwife, stop drinking caffeine, prepare a place in their house for the baby, etc. You would probably say they are crazy and so would I! It would be as if they are living in denial of this upcoming event, as if that's going to change anything about the event happening.
Realistically, their knowledge of this future event (birth of the baby) should inform how they live for these 9 months and they should be preparing for that! We don't call pregnant women "expecting" for nothing!
Yet, my confession this morning is that so often I live my Christian life focused more on now in this present world than later in eternity...and I end up looking like I am crazy and in denial. As if denying or not thinking about eternity is going to change whether it happens or not. Regardless of how I live or believe, history isn't cyclical, Jesus is coming back, there will be a day of judgment, there will be a day of redemption & restoration. But it doesn't mean that we are to sit around with our silly formulas trying to figure out when Jesus is coming back (that would be as stupid as my sister & brother in law sitting around using formula trying to figure out exactly when the baby is coming), but rather we should let the reality of the future events inform how we live today. We should live in expectant anticipation!
How would I live today KNOWING that Jesus is coming back, that I will stand before a judge, knowing that the injustices and bad things will be redeemed and restored? How would my life be different today if I lived not just thinking about now, but also about later?

“If you read history you will find that the Christians who did most for the present world were precisely those who thought most of the next. It is since Christians have largely ceased to think of the other world that they have become so ineffective in this [world].”
~ C.S. Lewis

Glorifying God in Daily Life

What is life about? Some have answered that "The chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever"(Westminster Catechism). I can imagine what it is like to enjoy God, but what does it look like to glorify Him? Is it something we can only do in worship on Sunday mornings, or can it happen other times and other places too? What does this look like in between running errands, meeting with people, going to class, cleaning the house, taking care of kids, etc.? The key to glorifying God is to remember that it isn't something we can do on our own, but rather something the Holy Spirit does through us as we are connected to God through Christ. It isn't something else to add to our to do list, but rather a lifestyle that should overflow out of our relationship with the Lord. Kevin DeYoung offers 20 biblical ways that we can glorify God in our everyday life:

1. Give God verbal declarations of praise (Rev. 4:8-9).
2. Live a life of noticeable piety (Matt. 5:16; James 1:27; 1 Peter 2:12)
3. Ask God for things in Jesus' name (John 14:13).
4. Bear fruit and show yourself to be a disciple of Jesus (John 15:8).
5. Declare the truth about Jesus (John 16:14).
6. Love your life less than God (John 21:19; 1 Peter 1:7, 4:16).
7. Worship God as God (Rom. 1:21).
8. Life a life of sexual purity (1 Cor. 6:20).
9. Live a life of generosity (2 Cor. 9:13).
10. Rejoice in God's glory displayed in creation (Psalm 19:1).
11. Do the works of faith (2 Thess. 1:12).
12. Use your gifts in God's strength (1 Peter 4:11).
13. Make sure everyone knows you're not God (Acts 12:23).
14. Live a life of gratitude (Psalm 50:23; 2 Cor. 4:15).
15. In matters of liberty, seek the good of others (1 Cor. 10:31).
16. Extend grace to sinners (2 Cor. 8:19).
17. Be a part of a local church (2 Cor. 8:23; Eph. 3:20-21).
18. Tell God you are wrong and he is right (Josh. 7:19; Jer. 13:16; Rev. 16:9).
19. Obey God (Lev. 10:3; Mal. 2:2).
20. Go from a Christ-despiser to a Christ-worshiper (Gal. 1:24).

What Am I Doing?

I started this blog focused around sharing what God was doing through my trip to Swaziland, and now that I've finally posted so many that I wrote during and about that trip, it's going to be changing a little to various topics. I have found that I really agree with the quote "I write when I learn, I learn when I write" and God is using this blog to continue that pattern. Some days, I continue to ask myself "What am I doing?" and trying to convince myself that it would be ok to quit blogging since I haven't done that much, but I know that God is challenging me through this process & discipline. Writing and journaling helps me to pray through things, process things, gain perspective on things, give things to God, and so much more. So for this next season, these are some of the themes that are on my heart that you can expect me to be writing about:
~ attempting to live life daily surrendered to God...resting in the reality of the Gospel...trying to comprehend that I am more sinful than I can ever fear, but more loved than I can ever imagine. There have been many things/people/quotes that God has used to spur me on in my relationship with Him, and the best thing I can do is to pass those on!
~ wrestling through the call that God has put on my life as a full time missionary - here in Denver and to the ends of the earth. During this season of in betweens where I haven't found the right fit with what God is calling me to do with missions, I know that He has called me to keep serving Him each and every day.
~ reluctantly letting go of our family farm and all of the lovely emotional baggage & crap that comes with sorting through and packing lots of family items. As I have begun to dig through the attic, there have been so many memories coming already, that I hope to write & share some of them here.

I know that through God's sovereignty, He puts specific topics on my heart for me to write about...for His glory, for my joy, and hopefully for your benefit, so know that I am praying for that as I write & share these blogs!

Be Careful Little Eyes What You See...

“Be careful little eyes what you see, be careful little eyes what you see, for the Father up above is looking down in love, so be careful little eyes what you see.”

This familiar children’s song is often used in teachings on purity, encouraging us to filter what images we watch on tv, look at magazines, etc. We know that we will be held accountable for all of the images we see, and that those images will affect our minds, even if we just glance at them for a second. I once heard someone say "You become what you behold" implying that what we look at will shape who we are.
Yet what about images of another nature...images of children eating crayons because they are so hungry, images of fathers patching holes in mud & grass houses, images of gogos putting food in their bags to take home to share with hungry family members, images of women in tears rejoicing over a month’s worth of food, images of a mother’s tears as she prepares to die and leave her sons motherless, images of a new orphan who doesn’t grasp the full impact of what just happened as his mother died, images of people hungry for God, images of children wearing clothes that are so worn down that they are see-through, images of illiterate people hanging on every word as someone reads the Bible, images of the three wet wipes it takes to clean one child's face, images of people unable to grasp the gift of a book that they can keep forever because they have no possessions....and so many more.
Those images also affect us, but in God’s sovereignty, He allows us to see things in order to take action. We live in a culture that is so bombarded by images that we are numb to most of what we see. Yet James admonishes us that if we see a brother or sister in need and don’t respond to that need, we need to take a second look at our faith that we claim to have (James 2: 14-17).
Our lives are to be full of actions...because of all that we have seen here in our lives, but also because through God's written revelation, we have seen how it ends. We know without a doubt that Christ will come again, that every part of this earth is groaning for redemption (Romans 8), that one day every knee will bow and tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, and that those who are in Christ will be raised to spend eternity with Him.

Yet with this glimpse of how it ends, God calls us to action.

He calls us to act now according to what we know will happen in the future...working towards His Kingdom coming, working towards reconciliation, seeing things in this world for the temporary gifts they are, putting our hope in eternity instead of the fleeting circumstances of today. Just as pregnant parents would be fools to not prepare and start living in the reality of the child soon to come, we would be fools to not prepare and start living in the reality of eternity that is to come!

What sticks?

For many of us, going to church and listening to teachings, podcasts, sermons is a regular part of our lives. But how much do you remember? Can you remember even the main passage or point of the message from last Sunday? How about one from last month or even last year? For many of us we are so inundated by so much information that we don't have time to process it all, let alone hope that it sticks to our memory, or that we might have time to meditate on it! But the Lord reminded me last week that this is not the case in Swaziland...or in most places of the world. In many places people are lucky if they can read and have a copy of the Bible. Some are lucky enough to have pastors who faithfully preach the Word or lead Bible studies. But many are longing for Christian fellowship and Biblical teaching, and when they get it, it sticks in their minds and in their hearts and God uses it to transform them.
Last year, one of the things I did as a team leader in Swaziland was to lead teachings several evenings a week. One of our Swazi ministry partners always loved to come to those times - he was so hungry for the Bible, for worship, and for fellowship that it didn't bother him that he would be hanging out with a bunch of American girls - he just wanted to grow. I never thought much about it at the time, but last week I had a conversation with this old friend that made me think twice.
One afternoon, we were finishing up at the carepoint and saying goodbye to those on the D-team that we wouldn't see again on our trip when he asked if he could ask me a question. I said sure, not having a clue what direction he would go with the question. But he asked if I remembered a quote I used in a teaching last November about being satisfied in the Lord. He said he has been thinking about it for a year and that it has changed his relationship with the Lord, and he was just wondering if I could write it down for him.
I don't remember the exact quote, but I know it was from a sermon that John Piper preached, where he talked about being satisfied in the Lord. He said that for him personally, he must get in the Bible each morning and be satisfied in the Lord before anything else...because if he isn't satisfied in the Lord, he is going to look to everything and everyone else in his day to satisfy him. And here is this young Swazi man, who knows through the poverty in his life that satisfaction can't come from material possessions (because they have so little) and satisfaction can't come from relationships (because life in Swaziland is so fleeting) and is now beginning to experience the reality that true satisfaction comes only from the Lord.
I praise God that He used that one quote from one teaching to draw one Swazi closer to his heart this year! And that He used that conversation last week to remind me to meditate on the many things He is trying to teach me...that they might bear fruit in my life and my relationship with Him for His glory and my joy.

"You open your hand; You satisfy the desire of every living thing."
- Psalm 145:16

From One Mission Field To Another...

As you are reading this blog, I am flying across the Atlantic Ocean...coming back from 11 days in Swaziland, where people's poverty is undeniable and they are unable to hide their brokenness behind material comforts. Yet I am coming back to the mission field of Denver...one of the wealthiest parts of one of the wealthiest countries in the wealthiest time in history...where there is so much brokenness, but it's hidden well most of the time. God has reminded me over and over and over that there is a mission field surrounding me here in Denver that is in desperate need for the Gospel. Before I left for Swaziland, I was at a meeting where a Godly man with a heart for Colorado reminded us that out of the 2.8 million people in the Denver area, only 600,000 of them claim to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ...which means that there are 2.2 million people who haven't heard about Jesus, or have rejected His offer of grace.
As I prepare to come back to Colorado, I am convicted and reminded that missions is not an 11 day trip that happens somewhere else, but a sacrificial lifestyle that we have each been called to live...for God's glory and for the eternal sake of 2.2 million of our neighbors in Denver. It's not a booklet to be handed out, a program to conduct, but the life of prayer, of showing and telling the Gospel, that God has invited and called each one of us into, no matter where we are living.

So as I come back, my prayer is that I would be faithful to Christ's command..."As you are going, make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you."

~ Matthew 28:19-20

"God, raise up a people who are no longer content to wait for a tingly feeling to go down our spine to cause us to rise up and do what we have already been commanded to do." (David Platt)

My Prayer For You As I Head Out

As I head out for 25ish hours of travel towards Swaziland, here is my prayer for both you and I:

May God bless you with discomfort
at easy answers, half-truths, and superficial relationships,
so that you may live deep within your heart.
May God bless you with anger
at injustice, oppression, and exploitation of people
so that you will work for justice, freedom, and peace.
May God bless you with tears
to shed for those who suffer from pain, rejection, starvation, and war
so that you may reach out your hand to comfort them and turn their pain to joy.
And may God bless you with enough foolishness
to believe that you can make a difference in the world,
so that you can do what others claim cannot be done.
In the name of God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, Amen.
(A Franciscan Benediction)

Half Of My Heart

I have to confess...some of my most powerful worship times are not in church, but rather in my car, listening to random radio stations. God speaks to me in powerful ways through songs that have been written about something else in life...but so often He uses and applies the lyrics of them to my relationship with Him. Lately it's been John Mayer's Half Of My Heart. I know, I'm taking these words out of context of how what he was thinking when he wrote the song...but re-read them as if they were talking about your relationship with God.

"Then you came on crashing in, like the realest thing, trying my best to understand, all that your love can bring.
Oh, half of my heart's got a grip on the situation, half of my heart takes time, half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you that I can't keep lovin' you, can't keep lovin' you, oh, with half of my heart.
I was made to believe I'd never love somebody else, made a plan, stay the man who can only love himself. Lonely was the song I sang, 'til the day you came, showing me another way, and all that my love can bring."

So often I am frustrated with myself because I am guilty of loving God with only half of my heart...and I long to love Him with so much more! He has freed me from loving only myself, redeemed me so that I can begin to glimpse what love really is, and show me another way...but I keep living in this self-destructive way of only loving Him with half of my heart! I was created to "love the Lord with all of my heart and with all of my soul and with all of my might." Deuteronomy 6:5
Yet as long as I keep loving Him with half of my heart, I will be left looking for satisfaction and meaning in the people and things around me....worshipping idols as so many who have gone before have done. As I seek to love Him with all of my heart, and be loved by Him...I will say with David that "Your love, Lord, is better than life....my soul will be satisfied." Psalm 63: 3, 5

In The Blink Of My Eyes

Why “In The Blink Of My Eyes”? The average person blinks around 657 million times in their lifetime; 17,000 in one day alone. We see so many images, faces, words, and our eyes are bombarded every moment of every day...yet if we are looking close enough, with tender and teachable hearts, the Creator of the universe, who has paid the price of redemption, is pursuing us, and is offering it to us in grace, is revealing Himself to us through every blink of an eye.

“The heavens declare the glory of God, and the sky above proclaims his handiwork.”
(Psalm 19:1)
“For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse.”
(Romans 1:20-21)

Not only have I been blessed to see the ways the Lord has revealed Himself in His creation - in the mountains, in the faces of His people, in the beauty of three continents. But also, He has revealed himself to me as I’ve looked into the eyes of so many people who are hungry for Him - hundreds of teenagers, thousands of suburban people, hundreds of orphans.

So, this blog is my futile attempt at sharing some of the ways that the Lord is revealing Himself to me in the blink of my eyes.

It has been a long (and hard) decision for me to decide to write a blog, but I have decided to...

• in order to keep myself accountable for sharing the stories that God allows me to have a front row seat on;
  
• in order to keep the writing part of my brain thinking (after so many years of school, it seems a waste to shut it down!);
  
• in order for me not to have to bombard people with emails to update them when I am serving on a mission trip.
  

I will use it not just to update you while I’m gone, but also to share with you the ways that the Lord is constantly teaching, refreshing, refining, and somehow using me here in Colorado as well. To Him alone be the glory!